Welcome to this special anniversary episode of Create Your Kindspace. Today we’re celebrating two years of the podcast. That’s two years of heartwarming conversations, deep reflections and one question I’ve asked every single guest “How do you create your Kindspace?”
The answers have been honest, surprising, funny, moving, but always real. So for this special episode, I’ve gathered some of those voices into a kind of audio mosaic and also stitched into it some of the responses from you my beautiful audience. I’m so looking forward to sharing with you some really beautiful ideas, centred around things like nature, our routines, movement, connection and growth, and throughout all of this I will be reflecting on the things I’ve learned from our conversations. So if you want to grab a cuppa and make yourself comfortable, we’ll begin.
Timestamps:
- 00:00:00 Welcome to the Create Your Kindspace Anniversary Special
- 00:01:13 Nature & Solitude – Kindspaces Outdoors
- 00:06:45 Routines, Rituals and Resetting
- 00:13:43 Mind-Body Connection & Physical Care
- 00:17:25 Relationships and Community as Kindspace
- 00:22:49 My Reflections on What Makes a Kindspace
Links:
To hear the full episodes from all my past guests, see: https://createyourkindspace.com/podcast
Transcript:
Caroline: For many people, creating a Kindspace begins by leaving their everyday space. Nature becomes a reset button, a place to return to themselves. For my first ever guest, Neil Bebber, his Kindspace was all about the water.
Neil Bebber: It’s always the sea, always the sea. Or, I mean, if I can’t find the sea, just water, open water. Yeah. Last night I was in a wood and on that wood walk, you could walk along a river and every now and again the river would form a pool. And we were swimming last night in a river pool, which was just incredible. And the night before, yeah, we were at a beach where the sun was just setting. And we were the only people in the water. For me, that idea of just treading water in the sea with the setting sun just lighting my face is absolutely my happy place. That’s, yeah. You know, like a dog can’t wait to go for a walk. I, you know, I can’t wait to be in the sea.
Caroline: That deep connection to the elements came up again and again. Pasna Sallis, founder of Weekday Wow Factor, found hers on a solo trip to Glencoe. Just her, her tent and a paddleboard.
Pasna Sallis: Yeah, it can be quite tricky to find your own space, but when you do, I maximise it. For example, a few weeks ago, I got an opportunity to do a solo trip. I packed my bag, I took my tent, my one person tent, and headed to Glencoe when paddle boarded in one of the wee lochs there. Yeah, camped out and then did Aonach Eagach with the ridge. So that was quite exciting and thrilling, quite challenging too. But yeah, I felt great afterwards, really good.”
Caroline: Sometimes, it’s not about adventure but finding quiet and stillness. Professional writer, Birgit Itse, returns to the same favourite beach, not to do anything in particular, but just to simply be.
Birgit Itse: If I feel down and need to uplift myself? [Yeah] My time. And that my time is usually my favourite beach, Don Mouth Beach. So I go there. I’ve got my quiet spot there. And I just sit there and be with myself, look at the sea, just notice things around me. And I sometimes stay there for hours.
Caroline: Hannah Reynolds from Collaborative Communications or CoCo for short who helps me behind the scenes with some of our marketing said something very similar about how calming she finds the water. She said “My Kindspace is anywhere near water. Sea, pond, lake, river… if it ripples, I’m there. I need to get away from my desk every day for a good stomp, and more often than not, I find myself gravitating towards water. There’s something so calming about it, and it resets my brain.”
Caroline: For Psychologist Dr. Jill Williams, Kindspace lives in the freedom of a dog running full-tilt across an empty beach. There’s something in that joy that is just so contagious.
Dr Jill Williams: for me, if I’m having a tough day, is to take the dog straight out on the beach. And for me, dog owners will resonate with this, that moment where you take the lead off and they just run with joy. Just that feeling is kind of contagious, isn’t it, when you’re on a big, wide-open space on the beach? That, for me, has always been the best way to be able to turn off those sort of, and leave some of that emotional load till the next day.
Caroline: I often wish that I lived closer to the sea and conversations like this also make me miss my beautiful dog Skye so much. Pets are a great motivator to get us outdoors as well.
Caroline: It’s incredible how many of my guests mentioned being outside as being a big part of their Kindspace. And for Darren Crombie, founder of Bridgit Care, it’s about disconnecting physically, digitally and mentally to reconnect with the wild.
Darren Crombie: Over the last few years, I’ve done more just getting out into wild camping. So that’s been my thing. So driving away, climbing to the top of a mountain. So the other weekend, I’m basically right now training for London marathon and rather than kind of do the laborious let’s just run on the road for 20 miles, I took my tent and then I hiked to the top of one of the peaks in the snow, pitched up and then did a kind of 14 miles run back to the car in the morning. And that just gave me a load of free time just to look at squirrels and look at birds and trees and cloud formations and stuff like that without any connection as well, because my 4G connection had gone on my phone, so it’s brilliant.
Caroline: Finally, coach Gemma Burns reminded us that while movement in nature is freeing, sometimes the true Kindspace is simply noticing the scenery as you go.
Gemma Burns: My go-to for years has been exercise. That is my, definitely my pathway to let off steam or to go for a nice long country, run along the railway line, taking the scenery or whatever that looks like. But there has been times where my health hasn’t allowed me to do that. Which I will admit has caused a lot of frustration and upset on the occasion.
Caroline: Of course, Kindspace’s don’t have to be found in faraway places or wide open landscapes. For many guests, they live right in the flow of everyday life, in the routines and small rituals that bring a sense of calm and clarity, even in the middle of our very busy days. And as we talked about in last month’s episode the need for a creative outlet was a big theme in how we create our Kindspaces. Let’s hear from nutritionist, Siobhan Jaffray, finds a kind of quiet joy in baking.
Siobhan Jaffray: Things that I like to do, I love baking. I find baking quite meditative because you’re not on your phone, you’ve got to follow a recipe, you’ve got to weigh everything out and everything’s got to be done to a certain way. Obviously, at the end, you’ve got this amazing thing that you bake if it’s turned out well. Yoga is something I do every day as well—and hiking and getting out. So being in fresh air.
Caroline: I love a bit of baking, it is such a satisfying blend science and creativity. Making bread in the morning feels like an extra special treat as the smells waft through the house. In general, I am a morning person and this was another thing that came up in discussions about how important our mornings are.
Caroline: So for example, Jenny Coxon a social impact facilitator shared her morning ritual on our social media, where she said “I listen to a few short mindfulness pep talks each morning. It’s a habit I’ve built since the 2020 pandemic, when everything felt chaotic. It helps me anchor in presence and think about how I reframe my thoughts for the day ahead.”
Caroline: This makes perfect sense to me, and it’s why I love journaling so much. Speaking of journaling, that has definitely been a common theme, with many of my guests creating their own journals and books to help support themselves and others. Another common theme has been music.
Caroline: Founder of Blooming Mind, Holly Clark, loves to journal but also uses music as an emotional compass, sometimes to lift her up, sometimes helping her feel what she needs to feel.
Holly Clark: Well, for me, music is a massive, massive, you know… I want to say mood lifter, but actually music just takes you where you need to be sometimes. I’ve got songs that when I need to have a bit of a release and maybe cry it out or anything, there’s music that will take me there. And then when you need to just lift your spirits, you can have a little dance around the kitchen.
Caroline: Unsurprisingly, music also plays a big role for Xann Schwinn, who founded a healthtech platform called Biiah that harnesses the power of singing! She turns to playlists and short walks to reset in moments of overwhelm.
Xann Schwinn: I try to go out for walks. So if I’m feeling really, really anxious, if right now I’m doing something and we’re on a work call and I get off the call and I can feel that like, I’ll take a step up and maybe walk around the block or go and get some fresh air and just try to reset. I have a bunch of music playlists that obviously I use throughout the whole day. I have so much music that I… I have a whole set of playlists and albums that I have on rotation that helped me based on how I’m feeling and how I want to feel help switch me into that energy.
Caroline: When I asked about music online, many of you on social media shared how important this is for your wellbeing. There is nothing I love more than singing! I have loved music for as long as I can remember, it is 100% my Kindspace, and keeps me grounded, I guess almost regulating my emotions. I’m always delighted when I speak to someone who also shares this passion. Like when I posted about my recent trip to see Moulin Rouge at the theatre on LinkedIn, and Nicola Davidson from the Success Formula said that she also absolutely loves music, singing and dancing and the theatre. And that every time she goes she imagines herself on the stage. Similarly, Ben Albert from We All Grow Together said “Love how this shines a light on everyday joy and self-care. For me, nature and music are the go-to kindspace combo.” So this just shows that it doesn’t need to be one thing, and that the effects can be amplified when we combine different things together.
Caroline: For brain health nutrition specialist and now two-time author, Dr. Clara Doran, writing is her Kindspace. Here’s what she had to say:
Dr Clara Doran: My kind space is linked to being able to write. So I feel if I’m struggling or I’ve had a lot going on, as you know, having your own business and founding something brand new is full of challenges that you don’t even know exist until they appear in your inbox. And when I’m in a place where I’m really feeling like struggling with different things, being able to write with my laptop or a notebook is where I would create my kind space. And finding somewhere where I can do that quietly, even if it’s at home, on my own, with the door closed, or I’ve got a couple of particular coffee shops that I’ll go to at certain times. I know are quieter. But once I’m there with my laptop and my earphones on, then after an hour or so, I’m ready to face the world again.
Caroline: And then there’s the joy of doing something with your hands. For Gemma Burns, DIY, especially during the long lockdown days, became both a creative and cathartic outlet.
Gemma Burns: My alternative, although I do do it in other times, is actually DIY. So I absolutely love being able to go, right, I want that to look different. What do I need to do to do it? And I will just give it a go. I did panelling through COVID, actually, was probably the most busy time that my house got the transformation that it needed because I had the time to do nothing much else. But I did panelling up my stairs that I never thought I would have been able to do. I probably went through a lot more wood than I should have done. But it was so enjoyable.
Caroline: Drawing and art was another theme that came up when I asked about this on social media. Gayle Thompson from Virtual Instructor-Led Training or VILT for short said “my Kindspace is when I’m drawing. Whether it’s cartoons or more ‘arty’ stuff, I can really lose myself in what I’m creating. It brings me such joy and contentment.”
Caroline: One powerful thread through so many conversations was the idea that our bodies often know what we need before our minds catch up. For Debbie Junor, whose decluttering business is physically demanding, her Kindspace is essentially body maintenance and includes massages, reflexology, and really anything that helps her to feel restored.
Debbie Junor: My kind space is also to my body, because for me, my body is my business. [Yeah, it’s a physically demanding job you do.] Physically demanding, and I constantly I get my massages. And what changed my… I love, is reflexology. Is literally my two things I maintain on a monthly basis. And I genuinely feel that’s what helps me to keep going, feel physically fit. And of course, you might be eight hours in the loft and you come down, you’re like, oh, my goodness, my body’s aching. But I believe that I need to keep my body as relaxed and take care of it as much as my physical space.
Caroline: Founder of Gut Wealth, Gemma Stuart, shared a beautiful reminder that rest is a ritual and for her, sleep is non-negotiable.
Gemma Stuart: for me sleep is like my absolute priority. Like I just, if I don’t sleep well, I’m not good. So everybody’s idea of a good night’s sleep or what helps them have a good night’s sleep is different. But like for me it’s.. I’ve got a really dark room which like so there’s that. And I also have a weighted blanket. So it’s a 20 kg blanket which when I tell people they’re like that sounds mental because like 20 kilogrammes heavy. But the way that it works is it’s got little beads, heavy weighted beads, and they’re all like sewn into squares so the weight is very evenly distributed across you. And what it does is it’s like the equivalent if you’ve ever stayed in a really nice hotel, you sometimes have a really heavy blanket and you’re a bit like, phew to start with, it’s a bit overwhelming, but it just really calms my, like, my breathing down. It just like, I get under it. And I was recommended it by a friend. And I remember the first time I put it on, it was like, what was life before that and now what’s life after it?
Caroline: Family Psychotherapist Pei-I Yang shared how she listens inward, learning to ask herself what she needs whether it’s music, prayer, tennis, or a moment with her pet.
Pei-I Yang: Over the years, I have learned to really listen to myself and listen to my body, my mind, my soul is telling me, it’s too much now. Go and play tennis. It’s too much now. Go and spend time with your pet, go for a walk, go listen to music. Go pray. Go listening to hymns and go play the piano. So there are many things I use to create that space for myself.
Caroline: And Rosie Davie, expert in all things pelvic health, keeps it simple: a few stretches, some mindful movement between patients or meetings. A reminder for us that your Kindspace doesn’t always need an hour, it’s just about setting the right intention and moving your body, whatever that looks like for you.
Rosie Davie: I think the gym is a massive one for me, movement. Sometimes what I like to do, because the gym can’t… An hour’s gym session can’t always happen, every day, depending on how work’s been or how demanding certain clinical lists are. So what I have done, rather than give myself a hard time over that, I’ll literally just get off my chair and I’ll do a ritual of downward dogs, some body weight squats, lots of thoracic rotations, and then I’m like, I’ve moved.
Caroline: Kindness doesn’t only happen in isolation. Many guests spoke about Kindspace’s that are deeply social. Rooted in relationships, belonging and joy. Founder of Doqit, Catherine Ann Reid, finds her Kindspace in her daughter’s community.
Catherine Ann Reid: I’m going to go back to Chloe, and I feel really lucky to be part of her community. So as an example, we were at a… one of Chloe’s classmates. It was his 21st on Saturday, and we went to a church hall in Hemley where there was a group of young adults, all of whom had varying needs and varying complexity. They don’t care about fashion. If they want to dance, they’ll dance. They don’t need to dance with anyone. They’re not thinking about drugs, they’re not thinking about drink. They are caring about each other. They’ll just randomly hug each other. When they see each other, they are delighted. And that whole environment, which is really honest and true, is as kind as it can be. And that for me, being part of Chloe’s community, is where I can go any day of the week to be a part of that, to create that kind space. Even something as simple as… Chloe gets to transport, so she gets picked up in the morning and she gets dropped off at night. And her wee friend is there. And I have gone out there in the morning, taken Chloe out in my pyjamas to the car with my hair all over the place. And her wee friend will say, you look really pretty this morning. It just makes your day. So being in her community is a really special place to be and where nobody gives a toot about about anything. It’s a lovely, kind, loving environment.
Caroline: I just love that story from Catherine Ann, if only we could all see the world this way. Family and community connections are so important. Pei-I Yang also shared how her husband is key to her emotional wellbeing, offering grounding and reassurance in moments of stress.
Pei-I Yang: I think my go-to thing is always going to my husband. He is such a calming person. Instantly texting him, speaking about my challenges, or I’m not feeling myself today because I miss my parents or whatever, he usually just calms me down straight away. However, he’s not my only coping strategy.
Caroline: Sara Matthews, founder of Baravere Studio, finds Kindspace in laughter and lightness. Moments with her daughter, or a simple trip to the hairdresser to help her feel recharged.
Sara Matthews: My brain doesn’t stop. So for me, my kind space would be to stop and step away and silence my nonstop brain. And so what I would do typically, maybe go for my gin and tonic with friends out, we’ll unwind, we’ll laugh and be silly, not talk about serious things. Just be like, be present. I would go for a hair salon trip and get my hair done because I like feeling glamorous and pretty. Enhance my feminine nature, I suppose just feed that a bit more. Maybe buy a bunch of flowers for myself because I love flowers… [Aww, that’s a lovely idea] Yes I do that. And of course, spending quality time with my daughter who is not a tween, as you know, she means how they are. They know better than you. They are tweens, but they’re going on 20.
Caroline: Spending time with our kids or the young people in our lives was a theme that came up a lot. Claire Patricia Campbell founder of Musoplay and a Kindspace listener shared her Kindspace. She said “My kindspace involves getting cosy on the couch with my two favourites: Oscar, my 20-year-old son, and Enzo, our little fluffy dog, and watching a comedy! It’s the best, although sometimes it can take a while to persuade my son!”
Caroline: And Scientist, Monika Gostic, reminded us that sharing the joy of moving your body with someone else, whether through salsa dancing or roller-skating, brings its own kind of magic.
Monika Gostic: Yeah, my partner and I do salsa classes. So, you know, it’s kind of us thing and then there’s salsa socials that we go to and it’s dance, it’s just dancing and there’s just something about the social connection and great music and moving your body. It doesn’t matter how rubbish you are. It really doesn’t. I’m not the best either, but I just genuinely love it. So it’s, it’s that again, moving my body. I love it. My daughter and I, we love roller skating, so we’ve got our skates and we go place that we put all our protectors on and we just go skate up and down. Then we go for family cycles or hiking or, it’s just that movement of the body that is genuinely bringing me happiness.
Caroline: Hearing these stories over the past two years has changed me. I started out thinking of Kindspace as something calm and quiet, a routine maybe that we set for ourselves. But now I see it’s about being intentional, whether that is something ritualistic, like that first coffee in the morning or going for a walk or something completely opposite to what you normally do to get you out of your head and into your body, or vice versa. It’s also about the things that you don’t do and setting boundaries. Several guests mentioned the importance of saying no and carving time out for themselves. And something I have to admit I am not always the best at. But above everything, I think the other thing that came across was how important it is to try different things and see what works for you. Having variety is a really good thing and it’s actually okay for your Kindspace to change as you go through different seasons of life. So I encourage you to reflect on What does your Kindspace look like right now? And maybe how has that changed over time? And how do you feel about that? And maybe what sorts of things would you like to try?
I just want to finish by saying a huge thank you to all my guests, people who contributed to this episode and you my beautiful listeners. I really don’t want the conversations to end here, so please join us by sharing how you create your Kindspace, I would be delighted to hear from you. So why not share your thoughts on social media, tag us @createyourkindspace. And remember to subscribe so you never miss an episode. I have lots more beautiful guests coming up for you to meet very soon.
